Childbirth

I've always been open to questions from people after our losses. One of the questions that people ask, comes from a place of not knowing.

How did you "have" the deceased baby?

I answer the same way you would have had your living child. How I envisioned my birth(s) changed slightly when I found out I was delivering a baby that had already passed. I still however had my vision of what birth would be like. I had very detailed birth preference sheet; knowing that I was "high" risk, I was well prepared that birth may not go according to my preferences. I simply asked that we be consulted with choices that had to be made; so we could make an informed decision.

The preferences I planned out, were to make my experience the most relaxing, warm, welcoming, enjoyable experience as possible.

I asked for a room with a window, and was obliged with it. May sound weird, but not being cooped up in 4 walls for 12 hours was refreshing.

I was not able to avoid things like the Hep Lock, but within minutes of delivering my placenta, it was removed.

Everyone has some "things" that they envision for their birth, even if they don't know them the day they find out they are pregnant. Things may not always go as envisioned, your baby may help you decide that an epidural, or C-section is necessary, but as long as you don't have fear in making that decision, that is what's most important.